Laura Fletcher, 32, furiously typed the heartbreaking 2,000-word letter about co-parenting. Laura claims she would ‘sacrifice all her lie-ins’ for the opportunity to look after little Isla full time and experience milestone moments together.
The antenatal mental health nurse said she hated having to take turns and feels like a ‘part-time mum’ who has to rely on Skype to get daily updates when Isla is staying with her father.
Her post reveals the ‘exhausting and expensive’ struggle of co-parenting and being in ‘constant competition’ with her ex.
Ms Fletcher, from Horsham, West Sussex, said: ‘One of my best friends said I was so lucky not to worry about being woken up at the crack of dawn on New Year’s Day, and every other weekend, and that she would love to have that time off. She didn’t mean any malice by it but missing these moments with Isla makes me feel sad. Before this happened I probably would have thought the same thing – it sounds idyllic but in reality it’s not.
I don’t think I’m lucky to not get to have her, and celebrate her very existence, on her birthdays – if they happen to fall upon a day where she’s with her father that year. It isn’t just birthdays, Christmas, Easter, and Mothers day are very difficult when you have to contend with if you co-parent/share custody. These may not fall on your ‘official’ days with her so you have to appeal to the ex to let you have her for the day, or at least part of it, sometime you may have to celebrate together if your ex will allow it. This is not what I would describe as idyllic!
Despite the breakdown of their marriage, Laura said that Isla is their main priority – and both are now in new relationships.
Ms Fletcher said: ‘We split up when Isla was three and wanted to make sure that she was, and remains, unaffected by our split.
At the time it was awful. Normally when you break up with someone you never have to speak to them again – you close the chapter on that bit of your life.‘We had to see each other every day, trying to establish new lives while discussing toilet training.’
To anyone in a similar position I would advise to remain child-focused at all times and think about what is best for them.
It’s not about you anymore or how you feel, it’s about your beautiful creation and ensuring they have the very best life from here on.
Read the full story and letter at: www.dailymail.co.uk